Looking For Love
by Disenchanted013
Summary: Mark is on a dating show with characters from Broadway! Kind of a bad summary, sorry. Please read, and don't be rude.


**A/N: So this is just a weird idea for a fic I had. I noticed at the end of RENT that Mark was the only Boho without a canon pairing (which isn't necessarily a **_**bad**_** thing), so I decided to hook him up on a game show to win a date with one of three lovely ladies from Broadway. I'm not saying the contestants' names until the end, but you guys are probably going to guess anyways, so . . . **

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own RENT or American Idiot or any other play/brand name mentioned, as much as I want to**

Me: Hello! And welcome to insert corny, love-related title here! Where we hook up one lucky bachelor with a date with one of our three lovely contestants! Today's bachelor is Mark Cohen from Alphabet City, New York! Say hi to the viewers at home, Mark.

Mark: Um, hi . . .

Me: Mark is gonna ask our contestants a series of questions, which will tell us about their personalities, then at the end, he will choose one to go on a date with. In order to remove bias and keep an air of mystery, our contestants' identities will not be revealed until the very end, after our bachelor has chosen. *contestants are shown behind paper screen revealing only their silhouettes* You ready, Mark?

Mark: Sure, why not?

Me: Great! Why don't you ask our contestants the first question?

Mark: *reading from notecard* Let's see . . . What names have people uses to describe you in the past?

Contestant 1: Rebel, saint, vigilante, yadayadayada. Just stuff along those lines.

Contestant 2: Wicked!

Contestant 3: Well, I don't know about actual names, but a few people have called me annoying before . . .

Me: Yeah, I can see that . . .

Contestant 3: Hey!

Me: Next question!

Mark: What are a few of your hobbies?

Contestant 1: Sending letter bombs and trying to find out where all the bastards have gone. I almost got it, too . . .

Contestant 2: Defying gravity

Contestant 3: Tap dancing and spying on people while they have sex

All: . . .

Contestant 3: What?

Mark: *whispered* Can we just eliminate her? 'Cos she's starting to kind of creep me out.

Me: No. You'll just have to wait until the end. Next question!

Mark: What type of experience do you have with relationships?

Contestant 1: Well, my schizo boyfriend left me for his 'inner self' . . .

Contestant 2: Not many guys wanted to date me, though there was this one guy-

Contestant 3: My last boyfriend was a scientist and a total ass who used me to take half of my brain, and then DUMPED ME for a man he made in a lab!

Mark: Again. Weird.

Me: Yeah, I know. Sorry about that.

Contestant 2: *to Contestant 3* Um, I hadn't finished yet

Contestant 3: No one cares about your pathetic love life.

Contestant 2: No one cares about yours!

Me: Girls! Settle down! Save it for _after_ the show

Contestants 2 & 3: *grumble*

Me: Now, it's time for our fourth and final question. Then our bachelor will choose his date, and our contestants' identities will be revealed. Go ahead Mark.

Mark: *stares at card* Really? You want me to ask that?

Me: Yes

Mark: It seems like sort of a pointless question . . .

Me: Shut up. We were running out of ideas. Just ask the damn question.

Mark: *shrugs* What . . . is your favorite color?

Contestant 1: Purple

Contestant 2: Green

Contestant 3: There's too many!

Me: Alright, now it's time for our bachelor to make his choice. Mark, who do you choose?

Mark: do I have to choose anyone?

Me: Yes!

Mark: Alright, uh, number two, I guess

Me: Excellent choice! Now we will reveal the identities of _all_ of our contestants.

Contestant 1: People just call me Whatsername

Contestant 2: Elphaba Thropp

Contestant 3: Columbia!

Me: And you have chosen *drumroll* ELPHABA!

Mark: You kinda look like someone else I know. Except you're, you know, green . . .

Elphaba: That's usually what sets me apart from other people

Me: Aw, they're so cute. Thanks for watching insert corny, love-related title here! And remember, if you're a pathetic loser who can't get a date, we got your back! *winks*

**A/N: So, yeah. That's my weird story.**

**For the record, I do **_**not**_** think Mark is a pathetic loser, and I love Columbia, and never meant for her to come off as so, well, psychotic. That's just what happens when you look at her life out of the context of Rocky Horror.**

**Review, please! And be gentle. This is only my second fic.**


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